Lindy said
So. Fred. Lindy said, upon his return from NYC, "so what's going on? You seem to vacillate on your blog." I told him that in this case, particularly, that vacillation is reflective of my reality.
I've been avoiding Fred all week. I didn't answer his calls Sunday; I stayed away Monday and Tuesday--even though he called wondering if I'd be out; yesterday, I left right after he showed up, despite the fact that he told me he wanted to buy me a drink (something that rarely happens these days, I might add). He called a few minutes ago to let me know the score of the Saluki game. And then was self-deprecating: "I guess you probably didn't really need or want this information."
I think he misses me.
I still need some distance.
Update: SIU lost to Alabama by 1-fricking point in the last seconds of the game. So close, and yet, we are always so, so far.trackback url: http://casachristy.bloghorn.com/trackback/1370
For Eric, who can't decide between snake-handling and eastern mysticism, I invented a religion: Buddacostal. He can handle snakes while sitting cross-legged and smiling benignly. Shortly thereafter, I had my big fight with Fred, who had condescended to me one time too many. In ranting about this the next day, I told Larry that I no longer cared what his motivation was, it was only his actions that counted.
I decided I wanted to make it my personal creed: It's not the motivation for the act, but the act itself. However, I wasn't sure how to apply this without hypocrisy.
Today, looking around, and finding hypocrisy almost everywhere, I decided I no longer cared. While I plan to apply this creed liberally regarding the people around me, I have no plan to stop making excuses for my own behavior.
At the risk of re-offending "CrazyBitch" who continually mis-interprets my post regarding last year's helicopter crash in Afganistan, I once again will remind my friends and neighbors: Don't poke the bear.